spunkybean - Big Brother 11: Nominations and Veto, Week 8

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Big Brother 11: Nominations and Veto, Week 8

Written by EJ Feddes

Tuesday, 01 September 2009 22:00

SUNDAY

Previously on Big Brother: Jeff sent Russell home, and he faced this setback with the gentle good humor that you might expect. Kevin and Natalie promised Jeff he wouldn’t be nominated if they won Head of Household, and for the first time in weeks, Jeff fans have been nervous. It’s not a good feeling.

We pick up where we left off, with everybody but Jeff trying to transport enough liquid into a fish bowl to float their marshmallow over the top. I know that sounds like a euphemism, but it really isn’t. Jeff’s laughing hysterically when people fall, because it’s funny when that happens. I would laugh too, frankly. Michele is worried, since she has no allies right now. It’s mostly running and falling for several minutes, highlighted by Jordan’s attempts to create the word “slipperier”. Hey, my spell check thinks that is a word, actually. I could have sworn the correct form was “more slippery”, but there you go. Still, it’s funny when she tries to pronounce it.

Natalie sees that Kevin is doing well, so she decides she doesn’t need to try anymore. She claims it’s because she doesn’t want anybody to know that she’s a “strong competitor”. Yeah, after eight weeks of sucking up every single competition, you don’t get to pretend that it’s your strategy. Admit that you suck at life and move on.

Man, this challenge is a long hunk of time, and there isn’t much to say, except that Natalie is riding my last nerve, and Michele is reaching her breaking point. Finally, Kevin manage to get the marshmallow out by bobbing for it, and against all odds, Kevin is the Head of Household.

Later, Kevin and Natalie talk about what a threat Jeff is and Michele has a good cry. She’s really worried that she’s going home. This bit gets a lot of screen time, but I imagine that this happens a lot – people just find a quiet room and have a meltdown. I’m not sure why we’re getting several minutes of frowny close-ups of Michelle. This is a weird episode. Twenty minutes in, and I have hardly anything to say about it. Man, I wish the challenges were easier to write about. I feel like I’m shortchanging everybody.

Time to see Kevin’s HoH room. Everybody gushes about how hot Kevin’s boyfriend is, which is kind of funny. It’s like “Damn, how’d you land him?” Also, is it just me, or does Natalie’s voice make you pray for deafness? Kevin reads a letter from his boyfriend and he cries. Like, instantly he starts crying.

Outside, Jordan talks a little about her family situation. Her mother lost her house a while back, and it sounds like they’re working together to sort of keep it all together. I like Jordan. Not the sharpest crayon in the box, but she’s such a sweetheart.

Natalie tells Jordan that she wants Michele gone, for reasons that don’t make sense. She’s going to act like she wants Michele out, but then will vote to evict Jeff? Why even bring it up, dummy? Jordan is unsure about her, because Natalie has never managed to actually fool anybody ever.

Finally, something amusing! Jordan announces to all that she’s eating a peach, and Jeff insists that it’s a nectarine. She remains convinced that it’s a peach, even though it lacks fuzz. Natalie assures her that it’s a nectarine, and Jeff and Jordan argue like an old married couple. It’s pretty cute.

Next, Natalie is vexed by a dragonfly, and she insists that somebody kill it. Jeff refuses to swat swat a dragonfly and Natalie freaks out. I like that Natalie is scared, but it’s tough to top Ollie’s fear of birds from last season.

Kevin talks to Michele about nominations. Unsurprisingly, Michele does not want to be nominated. Natalie says that Michele should go home because she’s a liar. And again, this makes no sense. She actually wants Jeff to go home, but she’s deliberately antagonizing Michele for no reason. She says it’s strategic, but she also thought that pointlessly lying about her age was a good strategy. I think Natalie believes that “lying” and “strategy” mean the same thing. Why is she still on my TV?

Everybody’s hanging out in the red bedroom, and Jeff is talking about how much he loves women in sweatpants. You know what? I sort of get that. Kevin asks more questions about Jeff’s ideal woman, and they compare Jordan to his standards. Jordan looks a little sad every time she doesn’t match exactly. I really want those two to end up together.

Once again, Kevin talks to Michele about nominations. Dude, you nominate two people from a pool of four. One of them is in your alliance. It’s not like you have a world of choices right now. Next, he talks to Jordan and Jeff. Jordan tells Kevin that Michele will come after him, and I really think they need to look at Michele as a threat here. Then, Kevin tells Jeff that he’s putting him up despite the deal they made. Kevin tries to frame it in such a way that makes it look like he didn’t screw Jeff, but that’s exactly what he’s doing. Jeff takes it pretty well, though. Better than I am, at any rate.

Nomination time! Man, there’s a lot of filler in this segment when there are so few people. Unsurprisingly, Natalie is not nominated. The only other key is Jordan’s, so Jeff and Michele are on the block. He says that they’re the strongest competitors, which is true. Kevin whines in the Diary Room about how he had to go back on his deal. America’s not buying it, buddy. Seriously, if you throw Jeff out, the public will whip stuff at you when you go outside. The narrator tells us that there’s still a twist that could change everything, which gives me some hope. And hey, this episode is actually really short. My DVR showed it as a 58 minute block of time, and it ended with four minutes left. What’s up with that, CBS? Don’t start crapping out on me at the end!

TUESDAY

Hey, you know what’s weird? Russell still appears in the opening credits. Usually, when somebody leaves, their exit appears in the opening, and their name doesn’t appear. Russell’s name is still there, and his footage is not of him leaving. A clue? Or incompetence? Probably that second thing. He’s also not in black and white at the very end of the opening theme. Huh. Is he still in the house?

Jeff’s not happy about being nominated, but he’s not freaking out and screaming obscenities like somebody we could name. And that name is Russell. Jordan and Michele chat in the Pool Room, and Michele calls herself a “lone wolf”, but I think I’ve already done that Hangover references already this season. Jordan feels bad about not winning HoH for Jeff. Awwww. Later, she tells Jeff that she feels bad, and Jeff tells her not to. He says it’s time for him to prove himself and win the veto.

Kevin enters the HoH room, and there’s a mystery door with a question mark on it, as well as a note. It’s called “Pandora’s Box”. Opening it could release something good or something bad for the HoH or for the rest of the house. Well, that covers all the possibilities at least. Kevin talks out loud to “Big Brother”. Wait, does he think that’s an actual guy? He might, because his chief worry is that he’ll open the door and be locked in. Yep. CBS is just going to start imprisoning reality show contestants until they die of starvation. That sounds plausible. A video shows a sign that says “To release $10,000, put your hand in the hole.” Anyway, Kevin opens the door, and there’s a whole room back there, with a box and a TV. Kevin reaches into the box and screams. Somehow, I don’t think there are hungry rats in there, though.

Actually, it turns out the box traps his hand. While Kevin is trapped, money rains down over the backyard, and Kevin gets to watch it on TV. The other houseguests gather all the money they can, while Natalie proclaims “This has never happened in my whole life”. I think that’s true of most people, dear.

Jeff and Jordan fill their clothes with money while Michele finds a basket and begins stuffing it. Meanwhile, Kevin’s TV tells him that “The key to your release is hidden somewhere in the house”. Finally, Natalie comes in the house and Kevin yells to her to find a key. She promptly goes back outside to gather money. When Jeff goes inside, Kevin calls out to him. And says that the only way he can keep the money is if he finds a key. Man, Kevin lies a lot now. Jeff finds the key and takes it back outside. He figures he’ll unlock Kevin after he gathers more cash. Ha!

Totals! Jordan picked up $1,726. Natalie made off with $1,904. Michele grabbed $2,563. And Jeff scooped up $3,181. Damn, not bad for an hour’s work. Anyway, Natalie comes to see Kevin and he tells Natalie that she has to bring him the key so that they can all keep the money. Finally, Jeff releases Kevin and he runs out to start scooping up bills, ending up with a paltry $626. Ha!

Veto time! Everybody puts on space suits and heads to neutral corners – they’re going out to the yard one at a time. Kevin’s the first one out, and the yard is decorated with a UFO theme. Oooh, it’s the face-merging alien. Only this time, each picture is made of two different houseguests but also colored green, with a bulbous forehead and antennae. Man, this could be kind of tough. The person who identifies all the pairs first gets the Veto, plus a home entertainment system. Hilariously, the first pairing is Kevin and Casey, and Kevin can’t recognize himself, and even claims “the eyes are so ugly”. He also says that the alien with Natalie’s eyes has “dead eyes”.

Natalie immediately makes excuses for how much she sucks at competitions, because that’s what she always does. Also, I just realized that there are six pairs and 13 houseguests – even though Chima’s name is on the board as a choice, she does not appear in any of the pictures. Which is too bad, because I thought she was an alien all along.

Jordan has a rough time, including missing Lydia (with her neck tattoo visible on the picture). Michele seems to go pretty fast, but it’s always hard to tell with the editing. Jeff can’t immediately recognize himself, but seems to do pretty well all in all. I’m so nervous!

Kevin had a time of 3:05, and Natalie pulled a 2:55. Jordan, poor girl, had 5:09. Michele has 1:52, which does not seem beatable. And Jeff dashes the hopes of a nation with his time of 3:01. NOOOOO!

Michele tries to give Jeff a hug, but he says “Get away from me”. I think he’s really upset, but trying not to go all Russell on everybody. He does say in the Diary Room that she beat him “fair and square”, and now he has to deal with the consequences. But what about us Jeff? What about us? We run the risk of recapping the rest of the season without you, and that’s not acceptable!

Jordan comes into the Pool Room to see Jeff. Jeff’s drinking wine and being sad. Jordan keeps apologizing, but Jeff (in the Diary Room) says that it’s ultimately his own fault. Natalie and Kevin talk about how great it is that Jeff is leaving without either of them feeling responsible. Kevin complains in the Diary Room about how Natalie keeps talking about how she’s going to win HoH next week. Yeah, Kevin knows that ain’t happening. Also, she wants to win so she can personally send Michele home. Well, it’ll actually be the Veto holder who determines who goes home next week, since there’s only one vote. But then, we’re working from the premise that Natalie could win something, so clearly our logic is faulty to begin with.

Outside, Jeff and Jordan are still in shock. I feel bad for the guy, because he has absolutely rocked this game, and there’s nothing he can do now. Michele comes out and says she’s going to fight to get Kevin to keep him, which sounds like the longest of long shots. She makes the good point that Kevin’s only concerned about not going home next week, and they might be able to make a deal with him. Jeff is only partly enthused, since him staying would mean Jordan going home.

In the Pool Room again, Jordan is crying and apologizing to Jeff – she wouldn’t have made it this far without him. She begs him to campaign for votes since he deserves to be there more. Jeff is still mad, but he’s very sweet here when he comforts Jordan.

Michele explains to Kevin that his best chance is to get rid of Natalie, since she will win the final two. She does have the votes in the Jury House, I think. Kevin confides that he’d rather go to the final two with Michele, and she makes the point that Jeff can get rid of Natalie. I think she should stress that they’ll keep Kevin safe. There’s no chance of Natalie winning anything, so she’s ultimately going to be on the block next week. Stress that she’d be the target, which guarantees Kevin in the final three.

Veto Ceremony! Man, this is making me sad. Obviously, Michele takes herself off the block. Naturally, Kevin replaces her with Jordan. Man, I’m really hoping that they can convince Jordan to break the tie in favor of Jeff. Although, I like Jordan too. Really, the only thing that matters is making sure that Natalie doesn’t win. Jordan vows to make sure Jeff stays.

Man, I’m glad that Myndi’s recapping on Thursday. I’m going to be a nervous wreck.

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