| What a Week It's Bean! June 6-12 |
| Written by spunkybean staff |
| Friday, 12 June 2009 14:00 |
Welcome back! We've checked our math and determined that is has, in fact, been a week. We can show our work if necessary. And as ever, pop culture has been plenty crazy. So crazy, in fact, that one person can't keep track of it all. That's why the spunky staff combs through all the news to bring you what you need to know. Except for the stuff about Megan Fox. Everybody's been talking
 about her for the last couple of days, but we're not sure why. We will look into this, but we think maybe she shot a Senator. By the way, this week we're leading with the happiest news we've heard in quite some time. Brace yourselves...
-Good news, everyone! After the success of the Futurama DVD movies, Comedy Central has ordered 26 new half-hour episodes of Matt Groening's animated classic. If we could find a way to transmit pure joy through the Internet, that's what we'd be doing right now. Bender's back, baby! (ej)
-Eddie Murphy confirmed that he will not be playing the Riddler in the next Batman movie. He
 broke this news in an interview with Stating the Obvious magazine. It's in the July issue, with the "Cookies are Delicious!" cover. (ej)-In an interview with Rolling Stone, American Idol runner-up Adam Lambert confirmed that he is gay "and proud of it". This is a rarely-used meaning of the word 'proud', by the way. This is the kind of proud where you refuse to talk about something when you're on network TV every week, and only address it when there's no chance that it could lose you any votes on a talent show. (ej) -In related news, Lambert also said his attraction to Idol rival Kris Allen bordered on "distracting". I think that explains what he did to "Ring of Fire" during Grand Old Opry week. (mw) -One more American Idol story for you...seems that Season 7 semi-finalist Danny Noriega (he of sassy neck swiveling fame who said, "Some people ain't likin' it" after Simon panned him) has put out a truly obnoxious music video for a tune called "24/7". The song features rapping by some chick named Diamonique, who clearly watches too much Home Shopping Network. Click on the video below to view the horror. (mw) -So, everybody's talking about Sandra Bullock's nude scene in The Proposal. Only it's a PG-13 movie, so you don't actually see onscreen nudity. In fact, she's just playing somebody who's naked. Talking to Sandra Bullock about doing a nude scene is sort of like asking her co-star Ryan Reynolds what it was like to have his face melted off, since that happened to his character in Wolverine. (ej)
-Russian officials have placed a cardboard cutout of Brad Pitt dressed as a traffic cop on the side of the road in Omsk, Siberia to slow down speeders. They say it's working. In a related news story, the number of orgasm-related car accidents involving women in Russia is on the rise. (cp) -Another talked about oddity this week was Brett Michaels' being knocked unconscious by a piece of  scenery after performing during the opening number of The Tonys. (There's so much wrong with that sentence, isn't there?) Well, in a statement that won Brett some cool points from me, here's his quote recounting the moments after the incident, "All I remember Shrek and Donkey helping me up and Liza Minelli handing me a towel." Now there's a reality show I'd watch! (mw)-Ratings show that the steaming pile of crap known as I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here! are off 28 percent since it's premiere episode. Some pundits believe it's due to the distinct lack of reality whores Spencer & Heidi. I think it's just that viewers realized there were no celebrities on the show and decided to leave those people (and Janice Dickinson) in the jungle until further notice. (mw) -Speaking of Heidi, though, it has been announced that she will be appearing in the September issue of Playboy, and there will be only "tasteful" nudity. As we say from time to time, once in a while, the jokes just write themselves. (mw) -In case you woke up this morning thinking, "Boy, I really wish I got to hear more of Joy Behar's thoughts on world leaders", your prayers have been answered! Behar will be hosting her own talk show on HLN (aka Headline News) this fall, while continuing her co-hosting duties on The View. "I just can't seem to keep my mouth shut, so another hour of conversations with interesting, outspoken people about the stories making news is right up my alley," she said. Or you know, we could get some duct tape. (mw) -Chastity Bono, the daughter of Cher and the late Sonny Bono, is undergoing the process of becoming Chaz, the son of Cher and the late Sonny Bono. Chaz has asked that his privacy be respected at this time. Alright, then, what does Elijah Blue think of all this? (mw) -While staying at a hotel in London's Hyde Park, Beyonce apparently filled two limos with security personnel just to go to London department store Harvey Nichols, a mere 45 feet away, and stay for a 20 minute tour. I don't know what to do with this information except think about slapping her upside her entitled head with that stupid metal hand from the "Single Ladies" video. (mw) -Danny DeVito showed up drunk on morning TV once again. A regional FOX morning show interviewed him from the set of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia where he was apparently drunk at 8 AM. Check out the clip below - you know how you can tell when you've gone too far? When Mac and Charlie are trying to talk you down. (ej)
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